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Are you tired of having to constantly mount and ride your bicycle? Do you constantly feel the need to push pedals for hours on end? Well push no more! With the new Murata Boy you'll never have to go near a bicycle again! Using "Jetsons" technology Murata Boy will satisfy all of your kinkiest cycling urges. Feel like riding a fixie with an ascot or maybe this thing? Let Murata Boy do it for you! He can track stand for days, now how much would you pay? But wait, theres more! Act now and we'll throw in the super deluxe hipster package that allows Murata Boy to hate on other riders! That's right Murata Boy will judge other rider's bikes and style right to their faces!
Operators are track standing by....
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