Industriousnesitude: Tyvek Toe Warmers

This is too good not to pass along. Via RANDONNEUREXTRA

I saw this and was all like

Check it out.

Happy Holidays - LHT Tree Lighting

Last week I finally got the family Christmas tree up. It was no small feat. Look for me in the evenings on the Capital Crescent Trail this holiday season.

If you see me, feel free to say "hi" or just yell "LEARN TO SPELL, ASSHOLE!!" so I know you're one of my readers.

Happy Holidays!

The Bikes Of Whole Foods

This big guy was hanging out yesterday. I dig the cockpit with the PAUL thumbies. My daughter was impressed by the extra plush rear deck pad. She is looking forward to when I get one for our bike. My other daughter just made farting sounds.

Gorgeous Failures In HD

Mind Spark 03 - The Crash Compilation on Pinkbike

The Bikes Of Whole Foods

Spotted this LHT(yeah you know me) and had a good conversation with the owner* who was happy with the balanced out ride with the front rack.

This iBert/Xtracycle combo was pretty pimp and made me feel like a douche for driving my daughter there. Had a nice talk with the owner** whose kneecap is proudly displayed below and her little cutie.

* Either Charles, Dennis, or Leroy
**Pretty sure it was Wendy?

Death Metal Girl, C'est Magnifique!

Mixed Meme Wednesday: Success Kid + Grumpy Cat

Let's just say that my not so productive day is bearing fruit. I give you Success Cat.

as in...

or

Picture. 1000 Words.

Not knowing any of the details I can only speculate the Wile E. Coyote had something to do with this.

via AHTBM

Traffic Was Pretty Rough This Morning

Insert "Honking" jokes here.

If You Can't Laugh At Something...

834 Miles Per God Damn Hour

When I was a kid I spent a lot of my time staring at this image of Joseph Kittinger skydiving from the edge of space. There was something truly mind blowing about this image. I never saw any footage of the jump or heard anything about it anywhere else. I just had this photo... to stare at.

Fast forward thirty something years to yesterday when Felix Baumgartner did it live in HD for me and my 4 year old girl to watch.


We both watched with jaws dropped as Baumgartner reached 834 miles per god damn hour. My daughter was totally engaged, asking lots of questions and making some pretty keen observations (for a 4 year old). After he landed we exchanged high fives and fist bumps and danced around the kitchen yelling about how great science was.

To make it even cooler Joseph Kittinger was leading the ground crew. Buh BAM!

Having said all of that, my daughter and I wont be drinking a red bull any time soon.

Inspiration: Not On My Road Bike

How To Prepare A Road Bike For A Century

I'm doing the Sea Gull Century tomorrow and I've not prepared for this in the slightest. I've known about if for months and I ain't done sheeyit. I expect the suffering/fun ration to be quite high. Having said that there is one crucial step in my lack of preparation that I didn't overlook. The Bike.

Here's how I get my Bianchi EV3 Reparto Corse ready for a ass chaffing century. I slap on my big couch of a Brooks B-17.

Much like donning a sombrero in a tuxedo this move will ensure my ass is comfy.

Ah ain't skeerd.

(I'm a little scared)

Parenting 101: Video

As a father this video tugs on more than a few heart strings. This kid is a bad ass, this dad is a bad ass.
 

Stolen Roof Rack: Big Trouble In Silver Spring

So I woke up Saturday morning to find that some shitholes had absconded with my Thule roof rack. This rack was locked to the car and doesn't seem like the casual theft of opportunity by some kids passing by. So the douche fuckers knew what they were doing when they picked or pried the locks and removed the rack without making a scratch on the car.

So rather than go over the details of what happened I'm going to illustrate the finer points using images and gifs from the 80's classic, "Big Trouble in Little China".

So I looked out the window and saw this:

 And at first I was all like:

And then I was like:

And my next thought was:

And I thought, Man! If I had seen the crooks I would have walked out the front door like:

And I woulda been like:
And then I would have dealt with their leader like:

But I'm not that cool or tough so I would probably have walked out and said something like:

Which leaves me with this:

So I'll wrap up by saying that having to tell your 4 year old that there are bad people in the world and the roof rack is never coming back to us is a bummer. 

If anyone in the DC area sees or hears of a Thule roof rack with a notch cut out of the driver's side tray so a mountain bike with front disc breaks can fit you know who to e-mail.

Her First Bike Ride

This is a short compilation of footage from my daughter's first bike ride. She's on the iBert and I'm shooting with a GoPro Hero on widescreen and I used windows movie maker to put it together.

Music by The Flaming Lips

Several figs were destroyed in the making of this film.

Cool Tool: BikePlanner.org

From the bit I've fooled around with this tool seems to be pretty accurate. Check it out,  Bikeplanner.org

Good Thing The IT Guy Is A Cyclist

On morning's like this when the DC humidity is justifying it's infamy, I'm thankful that the IT guy is a cyclist. A fellow sufferer who took pity on me and offered up one of the industrial back-up fans from the server room to cool my man parts.

For 5 years I've been the only cyclist in my office of about 40 people. The only one on the receiving end of barrage of weekly questions about how crazy it must be to bike into work.  We recently had a round of hiring and now we have a 4 man team and weekly training rides. My company is awesomely sponsoring us so I designed some jerseys and sent them off to Giordana for printing. We're doing the Seagull Century in October witch should be pretty fun.

Motivation is a good thing.

My Commute Stinks!

At least it does this week. Last week the DC region was ripped a new one by a storm that came down from the Ohio valley knocking out power to a kagillion people. Being without power for close to a week has some ill effects on the community especially when the highs were in the 100's. One effect that is now making itself painfully clear to me is that everyone without a generator had to throw out everything in their refrigerators. Riding through neighborhoods this week on trash day has been pretty disgusting as at the end of every driveway is a trashcan filled with rancid meat and dairy products. Another ill effect is the state of the Capitol Crescent Trail. Here are some photos of the storm damage taken this morning.

State College Diaries

I went to State College, PA. and took this picture.

State College is just as awesome as this picture.

Friday Inspiration

This is a great story from VeloNews. A must read.

Two years ago, Ernest Gagnon weighed 570 pounds. The 30-year-old lived in self-imposed exile in his Massachusetts apartment, leaving only to go to work and to the grocery store. He was depressed, lonely and suffering from crippling anxiety.
Then the doctors gave him the news and two choices: Gagnon had type 2 diabetes; he could undergo gastric bypass surgery or die. 

Gagnon chose a third option — cycling.

Read the Full Story

This story (like most stories) makes me want to grab my bike and make a break for it; even today when this is happening:

Red Fang Thursday

I'm going to see Red Fang. It's going to be god damn good. In anticipation of this I'm posting dome Red Fang videos.

Enjoy.

Tour de Fat DC: Tour de F#&K Yeah!

This past weekend I took the family to the much anticipated Tour de Fat at the Yards Park in DC and I must say that there was nothing lame anywhere to be found.
(Except the Yankees winning a block away)

There were sexy parade people...


There were lots of oversized board game classics...

There was lots of meandering...

There was a fake/real gameshow...



There were lots of chicks with drums, some say those are the best kind of chicks....

There was me on what I can easily say was the most fun "bike" type machine I've ever ridden. The concept of this amazing contraption was simple; make a bigwheel for grownups that power-slides every time you make the slightest turn. The best part was that if you turned too hard it would send you rolling off, combining my two favorite adrenaline boosting activities;  power-sliding and wrecking. Thank you New Belgium!
Here are some power-sliding action shots:

And here is a wrecking shot.

There were lots of other bike oddities to wreck on...

Yeah that's my voice talking to my 3.5 year old. Suck it.
I was unaware at the time but this video I captured Gwadzilla, (in the pink helmet) deftly outspinning his opponents who were flung far and wide and left hoist in their own petard. (0:45sec)

The event culminated in a ceremony honoring a DC citizen who traded her car in for a bike. Props.

So a damn good time was had and a bunch of money was raised. Cheers to New Belgium and WABA.

Junk En Las Trunk

A friend sent me a link to Half Moon Cycling today. I am impressed on many levels; the first of which being that there is an ass printed right where your ass should go, that's just good common sense. Also, any logo that looks like boobs is a good one in my book. The flaw I see with this product is that anyone with a pair of bib shorts and a some scissors can make their own ass bibs in a matter of minutes. Having said that, these have moved to the top of my "Shit I Must Have" list.

A Turtle Saved Is a Turtle... Somethinged

I saved this little guy from becoming an ineffective speed bump on Sligo Creek Parkway this morning. He seemed pretty pissed none the less. 

Pre Tour De Fat Party At The Pug

Last night I went with a buddy down to The Pug on H street for a New Belgium/WABA pre TDF party. There were lot's of Belgian style beer and bike people, which is always a good combination. There was a raffle to raise money for WABA and NB gave away hats, shirts, and a pretty sweet custom cruiser to this lucky gal.

I apologize for the crappy photos.

The place was filled with poorly lit blurry people. Gwadzilla is in there somewhere.

I had a nice chat with Katie, WABA's DC Bike Ambassador.

I tried the aptly named Tart Lychee, which was both tart and full of lychee. It was pretty damn good, however there is a time and a place and last night was neither. Maybe a hot summer day while grilling pork.

I picked up another piece of beeraphernalia for the LHT.

After having our fill of Belgian style beer, and being raffle loosers, we went next door  to Granville Moore's for some mussels, fries, and actual Belgian beer. I highly recommend the the braised lamb and Navigator mussels.

Over all it was a great night; we met cool folks, gave WABA some money, drank good beer, and ate great food.